Yesterday I was so excited to scan my first ever handmade film image on to facebook.
I immensely enjoyed reading all the nice comments on it even though...
It's not prefect by any means.
And then off I giddily went to photog class this morning... where it proceeded to kick my butt. (the class, not the image)
I am not even kidding. I had a really hard time in class today. It was one of those Murphy's laws kind of days.
Even I have to admit I am glad its over :) know what I mean?
it's just that I am nearing the threshold of stress which one person can take and still also be sane. You. Don't. Even. Know.
It's not the photography. It just feels like it in the moment. It's all the 'other' stuff.
The stuff in which i dumped off my shoulders to a friend at lunch yesterday. I hate it when it all pours out. I hoped she didn't think me crazy and horrible and grumbly. I don't want to be those things.
Seriously bless her heart for listening. I couldn't possibly feel less judged.
She called me twice today. Yes twice. The first time she called it was 6am. haha! I bet you're wondering just what kind of friend rings your phone that early! (A very good one :) and then again unexpectedly later just because she was thinking of me all day.
and she said to me "I can't believe you didn't crack a tear the whole time"
I am admittedly surprised by that as well, but then again this isn't a new discovery.
Tomorrows a new day + someone cares, that right there is reason enough for me to put on a happy face and strive to find the good I seek.
Sorry I can't share more. Please don't guess. In a million years you'd never be right anyway.
g'night :)